The American Carboy: In Defense of the American Automobile

by Montgomery Carlo

The United States is the fourth largest country on Earth, with wide-ranging ecosystems, from shivering mountains to scorched valleys of death. To the pioneers that first traveled to this continent, they could have never guessed the breadth of this fertile and wild land, but they had what it takes to explore and find out. They rode horses until their legs gave out, wagons until the wheels fell off, and even walked with only the clothes on their back to explore this new land. Even the native Americans took to their stallions and traveled with the buffalo across the expansive great plains. The American soil has been groomed by the stomping of travelers and explorers. 

Around the turn of the century, the internal combustion engine was perfected and put in the hands of the people by Henry Ford. The difficult and inefficient means of transportation were replaced by the ever-evolving automobile that we hold so dear today. The Federal Government completed numerous nationwide road projects and initiatives, but the crown jewel was President Eisenhower’s Interstate Highway System. Finally, the vast country was connected by a system of uniform concrete roads designed for the car. An average Joe could get in his car and take a single road from New Jersey to California for the first time ever, and the bones of that program still hold strong. 

In recent years, a new coalition of activists have been pushing for the abolishment of the car. They claim that the pollution caused by cars is speeding up global warming and wish to see the world rid of them in favor of walkable cities and trains. “Cars are too dangerous. Trains are better for the environment. Traffic ruins communities,” etc. Whole communities were destroyed by the way in which highways were paved. Robert Moses made highways going from New York City to Long Island inaccessible to buses to keep poor people out. Paterson, NJ went from the largest producer of silk in the US to one of the poorest cities after the adoption of the interstate highways cutting the black sections of town off from the white sections.  While these claims may be true, and the ease of European cities do lend to a higher quality of life, this line of argument is against the spirit of the soil that they stand on. 

These activists’ intermediate plan, until the abolishment of the car, is the electric car. President Biden has gone so far as to declare that by 2030, half of all cars in production must be electric, zero emission cars. Electric cars have potential but only as a local means of transportation for those who have access to a personal charging port. Even today the average time it takes to get an electric car from zero to full battery is eight hours. In 2022 there is no shortage of evidence of the failure of these cars: Teslas cannot move once they’ve lost a charge, the EV battery technology is prone to environmental factors that dramatically shortens a battery’s life, but worst of all — they cannot be sold on the used market. 

With most electric cars, when you buy the car’s insurance, there is a built-in “wear and tear” insurance covering the performance of a battery. Think of your phone battery — from when you bought it, to the condition one year later. The threshold is low for the insurance, but most can get away with not putting too much stress and get a new battery installed for free. Once the person who signed that insurance plan is no longer the owner, they will have to pay up to $14,000 to get a new battery installed. Compare that to any used car lot where there can be cars from 1960 gathering dust, and with the turn of a key can hit the road. Engines can be removed and you can stitch together a brand-new car out of the scrap of others that can, potentially, be driven for up to a decade. The lithium that makes up the battery of an electric car currently can only hold a charge for 5 years. Once that time is up they are doomed to rust and wither away with no future of a second life. 

America was designed with the car in mind. Its land is so vast and sprawling, with hidden gems tucked around every corner. The car gives us the ability to go wherever we please, fulfilling our own personal manifest destiny at the drop of a hat. Gas stations are plentiful and you can fill up your tank in the amount of time it takes to use the restroom, whereas an electric car charges at 0.3 miles a minute. The activists can have their walkable cities and local trains, confined to the limits of their city of choice, they can take their street legal golf carts to the office and back, and they can stay put — but the roads belong to the explorers. They make up the blood cells that travel throughout the veins of the interstate that keep the heartbeat of these United States alive. The activists can never take the car away.

Editor’s Note: “Good points, but still copping a Porsche Taycan with the Substack funds!” — Crypto Psi

Check out Montgomery Carlo out at @Monty___Carlo on Twitter!